Today, at work, we were doing an exercise where we had to choose a song that fit ourselves as we contemplated this next semester. My song ended up being 'Happy Days are Here Again' (thanks for the help, Matthew!) and I am thinking how that was a perfect choice, even though I had been at a loss to think of something on the spot. For one thing, I LOVE my job and I am definitely looking forward to another great semester with interns, coworkers and students.
But, as I look at my life as a whole, I am looking forward to some happy days, too. I feel as I might have stepped out of the dark to see some glimmer of light ahead this week. It's that wonderful feeling you have when you are not just making it through, but are looking forward with hope.
I know the hard times are necessary and inevitable in our lives and I am glad to know the amazing way God holds His children during those times. Those moments can't be explained and I am overwhelmed with how He has loved me and covered me with peace when I needed it. My relationship with Him gets deeper with each loss or trial in our lives, and I am grateful for what I've learned and experienced. These are definitely joyful times in many ways, but, I can't say they are 'happy' times.
Evidently God has been doing some healing in my heart, because it is feeling lighter these days. He is calming my anxiety about the burdens we currently have, and some that are on the horizon. He is bringing me laughter. He has brought good things out of our current situations, too.
I will have to explain on another day the way God answered some of our prayers during these last months, because He took care of us in astounding ways. But, today, I am just basking in hope. Feeling happy. Coming back to life. I just may not be totally made up of anxiety, grief or weariness after all. We might still have some heavy situations, but God is restoring my soul. All I can think right now is, ‘thank you, thank you, thank you…’