I Want to Live Like That...

I want to live like that....
Some days, the that I want to live like is a very selfish life. I can completely forget that I have a purpose outside of making a happy, beautiful life for me and my family. I want to have vacations, I want to live in a gorgeous house, I want to live with a focus on many more things than basic survival, and I want to live more comfortably. As if that wasn't enough, I also want to live without financial stress, I want to live without grief and loss, I want to live without health issues, and without disappointments. Oh, and let me throw in teenagers' 'know-it-all' logic - I can live without that, too, no matter how entertaining it can be at times. :)

I don't mean to sound so discontent, but, if I am to be truthful, there are days I really do want this life to be more about my happiness. I just want what I want sometimes. I'm just being honest.

Thankfully, though, God reminds me that I am not missing out on anything by not getting all of the things I want, because that isn't what I am here for anyway. I don't have to panic that I am not giving my kids all the things I wanted to give them, because God is going to take care of all of that when we are in Heaven some day. Right now, we are here for other things. 

I may not know exactly how He is using me, or using my family, but I know that He will if we give ourselves to be used by Him and that we will know someday how He worked all things together for good. Knowing that, as well as the promises we have of our eternal life, makes it easier to remember that this life is not all about my dreams and desires being fulfilled. That, in fact, those dreams and desires are not necessary for God to do His work in me or through me. Nor, do they bring me any closer to eternity with God. So, why do I strive for worldly goods and respect?
While the world may say that we should have everything we want, whenever we want it, God says He is enough. Whatever He provides along this journey is up to Him, and I will enjoy and be grateful for every ounce of fun and ease. But, if I don't get to travel the world, for instance, I will still make sure I live in a way that points to Him. 

I want to live like that and give it all I have,  so that everything I say and do points to You.  If love is who I am, then this is where I stand, recklessly abandoned,  never holding back.  I want to live like that  ….


Sidewalk Prophets, Live Like That 
Sometimes I think 
What will people say of me 
When I'm only just a memory 
When I'm home where my soul belongs 

Was I love 
When no one else would show up 
Was I Jesus to the least of those 
Was my worship more than just a song 

I want to live like that 
And give it all I have 
So that everything I say and do 
Points to You 

If love is who I am 
Then this is where I'll stand 
Recklessly abandoned 
Never holding back 

I want to live like that 
I want to live like that 

Am I proof 
That You are who you say You are 
That grace can really change a heart 
Do I live like Your love is true 

People pass 
And even if they don't know my name 
Is there evidence that I've been changed 
When they see me, do they see You 

I want to live like that 
And give it all I have 
So that everything I say and do 
Points to You 

If love is who I am 
Then this is where I'll stand 
Recklessly abandoned 
Never holding back 

I want to live like that 
I want to live like that 


I want to show the world the love You gave for me 
I'm longing for the world to know the glory of the King 

I want to live like that 
And give it all I have 
So that everything I say and do 
Points to You 

If love is who I am 
Then this is where I'll stand 
Recklessly abandoned 
Never holding back 

I want to live like that 
I want to live like that

Happy Days are Here Again

Today, at work, we were doing an exercise where we had to choose a song that fit ourselves as we contemplated this next semester. My song ended up being 'Happy Days are Here Again' (thanks for the help, Matthew!) and I am thinking how that was a perfect choice, even though I had been at a loss to think of something on the spot. For one thing, I LOVE my job and I am definitely looking forward to another great semester with interns, coworkers and students.

But, as I look at my life as a whole, I am looking forward to some happy days, too. I feel as I might have stepped out of the dark to see some glimmer of light ahead this week. It's that wonderful feeling you have when you are not just making it through, but are looking forward with hope.

I know the hard times are necessary and inevitable in our lives and I am glad to know the amazing way God holds His children during those times. Those moments can't be explained and I am overwhelmed with how He has loved me and covered me with peace when I needed it. My relationship with Him gets deeper with each loss or trial in our lives, and I am grateful for what I've learned and experienced. These are definitely joyful times in many ways, but, I can't say they are 'happy' times.

Evidently God has been doing some healing in my heart, because it is feeling lighter these days. He is calming my anxiety about the burdens we currently have, and some that are on the horizon. He is bringing me laughter. He has brought good things out of our current situations, too.

I will have to explain on another day the way God answered some of our prayers during these last months, because He took care of us in astounding ways. But, today, I am just basking in hope. Feeling happy. Coming back to life. I just may not be totally made up of anxiety, grief or weariness after all. We might still have some heavy situations, but God is restoring my soul. All I can think right now is, ‘thank you, thank you, thank you…’